I’ve noticed that loss and loneliness often go hand in hand.
To stay the course of cleaning out our home of 20 years before putting the house on the market, I’ve said no to several fun get togethers and adventures this summer. Spending hours alone in a dusty basement is a recipe for lonely. Ugh.
I remember 10 years ago feeling lonely as I grieved the deaths of my mom and sister-in-law. No matter what interactions I shared with people the fog of loss did not lift for many months. The grieving dominated while I went through the motions of life as best I could.
This loss is different. I am thankful to not have the intense brain fog, but my mind is noticeably strained with long to do lists and some sadness nonetheless.
While sorting items from our home, I relive memories of friends and family over the years. Cards, pictures, movie tickets, toys, and journals have resurfaced.
I laugh out loud, snap a picture to capture certain memories before tossing items, and give thanks for the experiences. I don’t need the fading construction paper from my children’s preschool masterpieces, but I do want a remaining image of their artwork in case I choose to revisit digital pictures that do not require space or dusting in our next home.
I feel lucky for friends in my life whether they are here for a season, reason, or ongoing. I’ve had time to think about friends and how much they’ve meant to me along life’s trail. I am reminded to text or email girlfriends I haven’t spoken with in a while. And close friends who know what’s going on have helped or offered to help in this process.
It’s like I’m in adult time out.
I have long talks with God on my worn path to Goodwill.
Memories made with friends along the trail of life improve my energy. Oh, and ibuprofen could almost be called a friend at this point too! Ouch, my muscles hurt.
Sometimes I think when this is over I will spend a week in bed, but I really won’t do that when the time arrives. I will call a friend and choose an adventure.