Tag: #corporate

Do The Work, White People

Published on by Glenna S. Edwards2 Comments

White People,

I feel like I’m in a game of “Not It!” with you. That’s what I think when I see people try to throw down a meme that misses the point.

If you want to do better & you want society to do better, then you have 2-4 jobs right now:

  1. Listen. Listen all the way. Listen without having a single thought about what you think about a topic. Listen to hear something new. Listen to someone who does not look like you. Do not say one word about what you think unless you have done the work.
  2. Read. Read something credible like a book that can teach you something that you never considered before. And you’re going to have to be patient. Don’t give up after two paragraphs like one of my friends who direct messaged me, “I don’t agree, and I just can’t do this.” Read all the way. Here are 3 books that I have devoured this summer so far. I could not be happier about the discoveries and glossary of terms that I am now aware of. In fact, some things that bothered me in the past I now have words and definitions for about why. I could not put my finger on certain concerns before, but now I can. I have plenty more books to read soon too.
  3. Watch. If you are not willing to read or listen to books from the public library or Audible, if you have no one in your life that you can really talk to in a way that you could learn something different, then Netflix has a bunch of Black Lives Matter movies picked for you. Or you can find some of the above mentioned authors or topics discussed on YouTube and in TedTalks.
  4. Support. Support people who know more than you do. Donate to or buy from Black led organizations. Go stand in support at a peaceful event. [Please wear a mask for the health of all.] Tell someone you care about them and you are here for them. I loved when my pastor said in a sermon recently, “If you’re not Black, then you don’t know.”

There is plenty to do if you really want to be helpful.

Do you ever remember learning how to be antiracist when you grew up? Did you attend an anti-racism class as a child? No?!? Of course not. Find out why. Now is the time to do the work of learning. It is not too late. Even one shift in the way you think will help you, your family and future generations. I read Matthew 18:1-5 while writing this and am reminded that we must humble ourselves and learn like little children.

I have witnessed or heard of many misguided moments lately. If you lead a company and you think oh, let’s get all the Black people in a room and ask them what to do, then I call “not it!” Yes, every voice is needed, but you may do more harm than good if you have not done your work. Here’s a key fact:

Systemic racism requires systemic change.

If you’ve done your personal work and you really want to end racism, then we have to change how we do business. This means required trainings, for example. Everyone can benefit from implicit bias and racial equity training. What if every policy and hiring is required to be run through a racial equity checklist? Real progress happens when we change every day practices.

It can be painful to see well intentioned people scurrying to do or say things while assuming they know what to do. You know what happens when you assume, right?

When you do the work in your own heart and mind first, then your next steps will be better.

Love,

Signature GSE

P.S. If you feel defensive or angry while reading this, then this post wasn’t for you. This was written for folks who truly want to love one another.

Discipline, Fear & a side of #MeToo

Published on by Glenna S. Edwards2 Comments

I resent that she was right.

She made a tsk, tsk sound and shook her head, “If you leave this job, you will never make that kind of money again.”

That was December 2007. I have yet to prove my mother wrong.

My career field path has been mental health, then leave for money in the corporate world, miss my first loves of mental health and writing, and then go back to mental health. Hubby was supposed to grow his career so I could work in my passion areas, but that didn’t evolve as we hoped, and his body failed. Our plan fell apart. Now we regroup.

I enjoy my current job working with families and children. It is hard work but manageable. When I saw a job posting last week back in corporate, I asked Hubby if he thought I should dive back in for the cash. He texted, “We can ponder and talk about it, but I’d hate for you to sell your soul again.”

He knows me. My skills could adapt. It is my heart that would struggle. I am curious, though, what that paycheck would be like in the #MeToo era.

I used to tell my mom some of the male shenanigans and how few women were at my old job. She would say things like, “Just take the money. You can ignore them.”

This came from a mom who once jumped out of her car in traffic to yell at a man for being a man (and for cutting her off). I begged her to get back in the car. I saw rage in her eyes that was way more about the way men treated her over the years than a driving violation. She felt trapped by men who had no more education, sometimes less, than she did.

My biggest challenges in the business job were not about overlooking some of the men’s words and behavior. What I struggled with most was knowing how capable I was of playing by their rules. That’s taken time for me to reflect and realize. The truth was I could assimilate. I scared myself. I ignored too much.

At my core, I am no Daisy from The Great Gatsby. I am not made to be Reba McEntire’s “Fancy”.

Back then, I read the books Play Like A Man, Win Like A Woman and Hardball For Women (now in its third edition) thankful that the authors could give me insight.

The long days were exhausting to navigate, but in my mind I played the Kenny Rogers song “The Gambler” to cope:

You gotta know when to hold ’em.

Know when to fold ’em.

Know when to walk away.

Know when to run…

Practical issues were tough. I had a hard time figuring out how to pay for things necessary to pull off a high level job. Childcare, for example, was expensive. Keeping a clean home with two little ones was impossible; the life size Rubik’s Cube fierce. I learned after leaving that the guy hired to take my place was paid near double what I was paid for the same job.

That part of my journey shows up in my manuscript Martha’s Daughter. The book is fiction with a dose of experience. You read about main character Amy’s childhood secrets at home and school, how she overcomes the cultural lies around her as she matures in adulthood, and how she assesses true love. Will she learn to speak her truth beyond the days of Barbies and mud pies to her days in Corporate America?

I think there is still a lot to unpack about the #MeToo movement. My book takes the reader from the 1970’s/80’s to present day. Imagine a female Forrest Gump, or better, Jenny’s story if anyone bothered to ask her. My favorite part of the book are the Developmental Assets and caring adults that save my character. That is the crossroads where my love of mental health and writing meet.

Think about what women have been through in five decades. Think about the undertones, the unspoken, the rules. Think about how much isn’t obvious. Consider the frustration.

I cheered this year when the Today Show normalized motherhood and women at work. Multiple hosts needed time off for their children and everyone appeared to pitch in and be happy for one another. Savannah, Hoda, Jenna, Dylan, Sheinelle, thank you and the team around you for your fresh example.

I’ve spent too much of my life feeling fearful for various reasons. Right now is the worst.

The Thanksgiving break has been helpful for me to notice my thoughts. I paid attention to my constant worry that something in the house or car might break, that we’ve got to get out of this home before it is impossible for Hubby to crawl up the stairs, or blah, blah, blah, fill-in-the-blank fear after fear.

This weekend I had my first pet sitter side job. Being in someone else’s home energy rebooted me to believe that I can move on to a new energy, a new day, a new place. I do not want to dwell in the fear. It’s time to reset.

Beginning today I am all about discipline over fear. My goal is to get our house back to sell-ready. I want o-u-t! I want to be in a situation that is affordable. I want us to thrive above ALS. This situation will not consume us. I will fight for a win.

I am going to clean, straighten, pack, look for a new realtor, seek financial advice, and persevere.

I have learned so much about discipline with sweat over every penny this year. It’s time to take that discipline further into a new situation. We will pray, turn over the worry daily, and triumph.

Bring on the V8 Energy drink. It’s time to climb further up the mountain.

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…for God hath not given us the spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of self-discipline.

2 Timothy 1:7