I ponder who to call.
The friend who will cheer for the dream despite disappointment? The problem solving friend? The friend who will wallow in the sadness with me for a few minutes? The friend who will say what I want to hear?
Stars are visible in the night sky. I drive silent. The Holy Spirit touches my heart and I sense a, “How about you tell Me first?”
This leads me to ask myself, How many times do I tell God last?
This time I choose differently. I turn off the car and sit in the driveway to converse with our Creator before approaching the threshold into house chores, next day work prep, mom, wife, and caregiver roles.
The publisher that stayed in touch since June and seemed to seriously consider my manuscript finally sent the decision email. I’m sad, Lord. She’s passing. I really thought she was the person to take next steps with me. Please show me what to do going forward. I surrender to Your will for this book. Amen.”
One thing I’ve learned especially in the last two years is that every time I am perplexed the best choice is to surrender. Immediately.
What to do will become clear soon. For now I will be still and listen.
Exodus 14:14. The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still.